After 11 days of intense apartment searching, calling, viewing, and kissing a lot of toads, we finally found a place. (I’ll explain the move and what happened to the original place in another post. Bastards.) It’s not quite as posh as my condo (nothing will be short of winning the lottery), but at least I won’t burst into tears when I enter. Long story short, ninety percent of negotiations over financial issues have been completed – a few more hoops to jump through and the deal will be done. So thankfully, we don’t have to hit the panic button and discuss having an unexpected extended here with friends. While my friends have been beyond welcoming in their large comfortable home, I sorely need my own place. And Patty the pom back. (She’s staying with her foster parents in Michigan.)
So I’m standing on the very cusp of my new suburban life. But not being able to see forward in the metaphorical distance made me a bit nostalgic as I stood in the empty apartment gazing out the window at a prairie. Suddenly I realized that the hazy city horizon lie 26 miles away. After residing there all my life and living downtown for 25 years, it evoked a wistful yearning. I suppose it’s a kind of grief – an unwanted loss of part of my life.
It made me think of the following classic folk song that’s been stuck in my head. Oh Shenandoah describes a sense of longing for the past. One of my favorite burgeoning a capella YouTube singers, Peter Hollens, made a lovely rendition of the song. It’s a beautiful song which didn’t hold much meaning for me until now. Of course, I’ll get past this but for right now, I yearn for my own Shenandoah.
What a beautiful version of that song! The song itself has been a favorite of mine since forever.
Congrats on finding a good place, Judi. It’s a great start to your next adventure. Feeling grief for something beloved is a good thing. I hope that the melancholy slides into excitement for what lies ahead.
Thanks Zan. I’m feeling better each day. So glad I went to see
The Man, er, whatshisname. 😉 It helped draw a dramatic line between Then and Now and stop me from ruminating too much in my idle time.
Judi…Congratulations and HUGE EXHALE to know the new space is just on the horizon for you at last!!!!
As for the grieving – I’ve got to say, grieving is very good. I’m one of those sick and twisted people who seems to have a perverse enjoyment of the grieving process. It’s like a good purging – if you’ve done it somewhat regularly, it doesn’t get to a state of becoming too overwhelming. So if we find ways to grieve in small ways and be in tune with our feelings in the day-to-day… it may help make the really big transitions slightly less overwhelming. But whether intermittent purge or one HUGE MOVING DAY PURGE, the day usually comes when we have to acknowledge that one cycle has ended and another one is beginning.
I look forward to that new cycle in your life – but I DEFINITELY respect and honor that urban and central downtown life you have lived and loved before.
Sending you lots of love from London.
Thanks so much UK. I’ve been keeping mind what you said about looking forward while acknowledging the less positive feelings. Had a HUGE crying jag while packing; shed more tears when I toured the condo and closed the door for the last time; became misty eyed while listening to Shenandoah. It’s helped and I’m feeling progressively better. Dare I say that I actually look forward to moving in? 😀
The Chicago skyline is beautiful (I thought of you when I drove past it the other day). Congrats on finding the new apartment and I am *really* hoping that new sights, visions, landscapes will open themselves up to you and make you happy.
Patty’s doing a leaf peep in Michigan, huh? I bet she misses you.
Thanks Serv. I’m really hoping, too. Support system tells me I will be in a good place and will be fine and busy. Heavens know I’ve been running nonstop out here for the last three weeks. No problems with stimulation here. 🙂
Congratulations, Judi. 26 miles is but a commuter train-ride away and once you get settled and have ” your things” as well as your pup with you, it’ll be home. Amaing how quickly you pulled all this off.
I moved only 26 miles away – can’t imagine what is was like for you to pick up roots and move to Mexico. I salute you!
Yes, the stars and planets seemed to align themselves. Don’t think could have planned it better.
Judi, all the best wishes for your fresh start. That have been some downright eventful weeks, the last weeks!!! Sending you lots of love from Munich.
Thanks Linda. You’re right. Since the end of July it’s been absolutely insane. Can’t believe I’ve made it this far. Stayed tuned for story of my trials and tribulations. And also 6 foot 2 inch whathisname. 😉
Congrats on the new place! It has to be better than the “apartment” (one room+bathroom) I lived in while in lovely Des Moines. 😉 I’m glad you have a place and will be reunited with Patty soon. Also, I didn’t get an email notification….
Yeah, I obviously dropped out as well…… 🙁
You’ll still good. WordPress updated at the same as the new Google 2-step verification. Things were messed up but I think it’s okay now.
Thanks Snicker’s! It’s actually a nice place considering the dogs I’ve seen. Will be able to finally get settled in with Patty so I can DECORATE. 😀
Ohh, that is good news, finding a new place to live in is always painful and it is hard to find one which says home. Who knows having the city nearer may prove to have its advantages as well. But i’m sure you’ll manage to transform it into home soon, especially once you have Patty back 🙂 Bestest of luck and hope you feel comfy there soon 🙂 xx
Hi Hariclea. The way things look now, I may finally move in in 8 days. *Fingers crossed.* 🙂
Good luck in your new place. I have lived in the same house for 36 years, and nothing short of dynamite could get my husband to move. I think getting into a new environment, although challenging, can give anyone a shot of adrenaline and a spark of excitement.
Thanks Kathy. I suppose there’s a spark of excitement, but right now lingering anxiety and fear feel most prominent. Soon this will be over.
trying to sub comments again
Don’t think you need to re-sub. I’ve been beating WP with a mallet all day; things should work now.
Sounds like a monumental racket……. 😀
I hope you are settled in now, and that things are approaching a new normal. I know I’m really late, as I seem incapable of catching up on email at this point…. but wanted to THANK YOU for sharing, with your Shenandoah- this amazing Peter Hollens! How have I missed this guy?? I love acapella, and he and his amazing singers are the bomb! Take care & thanks again.
Congratulations! I’m so happy for you and your dog. May it be everything you hoped for.
Glad that you have found your new home and that Patty will be with you soon! I feel a road trip coming on. Ha! Beautiful song! And I love this man’s singing! Hugs!