Just realized the month is almost over and the new year’s resolution to start writing again is just about DOA. So I’ve resolved once more to get it together. The only way to do it is just START. Pulling together the technical aspects for the blog is interesting; everything is now prepackaged. I can barely know what CSS is although back in the dark ages of the early 1990’s, I could do HTML by hand. Time has certainly marched on.
My writing skills have suffered too although ironically it’s all I do all day as a lawyer. However that is highly specialized, dry and canned. I fear the creative part of my brain has atrophied. Thoughts do not easily flow from my pen (or keyboard now) anymore. In college, I could pound out short stories fully formed on a typewriter with no editing and still get “A’s.” In retrospect, I realize that was pretty damn amazing and should have nurtured that skill. I was told I had talent, so I dreamed of writing the Great American Novel. But I went to law school where as Professor Kingsfield said in the Paper Chase, “you come in here with a skull full of mush and you leave thinking like a lawyer”. Well, part of that mush contains the spark of creativity needed for the mind to soar. After over 25 years of thinking inside that legal box, the muscular analytical left side of my brain can hammer you to the ground. The creative right side needs paddles to keep going.
I realized things had gotten very bad when a year ago I wrote a very short story for the first time in 13 years. I couldn’t keep it simple; oh no, not me. It was a complicated little piece of fanfic. My mind instantly jumped to popping this baby out and it took three days to match words on paper to images in my mind. It felt like mental labor. I intended a follow-up story but felt so spent I could not transform a vague idea into a coherent outline. I asked a blogger who seems to effortlessly write reams every day how she does it. You know, the kind who dashes off a post and you think: “that’s EXACTLY what I was trying to say!” She said simply, ” write every day and write some more.”
So here I am, writing.